Hi guys,
I've been playing around with ideas for my tag line and blurb for my up and coming book, Revenge in Rio (with the lovely Beachwalk Press) and would love your thoughts on it so far. The blurb is allowed to be up to 250 words, so I'm good at the moment. Does it grip you? Would you want to read it? Too wordy/not enough words? Does it flow? Make sense? I'm open to all suggestions and would love any feedback. Cheers muchly! :-)
***
Calculated
revenge, unexpected passion…
Business
magnate, Luca Venancio is returning to Rio for two reasons; to pay his respects
to his late brother, and to have his once fiancé, Daniella, in his bed. Call it
revenge, if you will. Nothing more and nothing less. She left him without so
much as a word five years ago; shunning him and the rich life he could offer,
all in exchange for his younger, reckless brother.
Blackmailed
into a violent, and farce of a marriage, Daniella had no choice but to comply to
protect Luca’s life; even if it did mean never being able to see him again. But
five years later, a twist of fate unexpectedly reunites them both, and throws
her plans of fleeing Rio well and truly out of the window and the love of her
life straight back in.
Luca’s
flawless plan soon becomes complicated when he discovers Daniella is expecting
his brother’s child in a matter of weeks… can he really go through with
seducing her, bedding her and then discarding her? And will it result in more heartache for Daniella as a result of his vindictive games?
***
Sam :-)
X
Why is it so easy to write a 50K novel, but 250 words are so hard? :)
ReplyDeleteIt does seem a bit wordy. But that's my taste. I only glance at a blurb and if a few words catch me, then I read it line by line. (I've gotten way to picky because my TBR pile right now won't be read in my lifetime, even if I live to be 190)
Good Luck
Keep the Faith
Thanks Faith :-) You're SO right about 25o words being difficult!
DeleteHey Sam! I made some changes, just so it would flow better... I'd also look for some snappier words. It's just too early here for me to think straight. Lol. I hope this helps :)
ReplyDeleteOverall it's great, we can see the conflict, it just needs to be punchier. :)
Calculated revenge, unexpected passion…
Business magnate Luca Venancio is returning to Rio to pay his respects to his late brother, and to have his once fiancé, Daniella, in his bed. Revenge... Nothing more and nothing less. She left him without so much as a word five years ago; shunning him and the rich life he could offer, all in exchange for his younger, reckless brother.
Blackmailed into a violent farce of a marriage, Daniella had no choice but to comply to protect Luca’s life; even if it did mean never being able to see him again. Five years later, a twist of fate reunites them both, and throws her plans of fleeing Rio out of the window and the love of her life straight back in.
Luca’s flawless plan soon becomes complicated when he discovers Daniella is expecting his brother’s child in a matter of weeks… can he really go through with seducing her, bedding her and then discarding her? And will it result in more heartache for Daniella as a result of his vindictive games?
Oh fantastic! Thank you Carmen. That's great, thanks for your help :-) xx
DeleteLOVE the tagline! And great blurb too. Would definitely entice me to read it. :-)
ReplyDeleteGood luck x
Thanks Tracey! xx
DeleteLove this, absolutely fabulous!
ReplyDeleteAw, thanks Michelle :-D Can't wait for it to be released x
DeleteYes, "Blackmailed into a violent farce of a marriage..." is better, imo and yes, it does sound intriguing!
ReplyDeleteThanks mshatch! :-)
DeleteExciting. I can't wait to read this :) xxx
ReplyDeleteThanks hun. I hope you enjoy it xxx
Delete